[2014032] Sex with Animals
Ryan the Bisexual Lion @ Garden of Unearthly Delights – The Spare Room
10:45pm, Wed 19 Feb 2014
Ah, The Spare Room – the most uncomfortable venue in The Garden, if not the Fringe. As I waited to be let into the tight, narrow venue, I wind up talking to two guys in the queue; unseasonal drizzle started falling, I offered them shelter under my umbrella, and – as usual with me – the conversation turned to what shows they’d seen. “Nothing really good,” said one, “though we saw one of the worst shows ever the other night.”
“Oh,” I asked, keen to hear a bit of venom, “which one?”
“Last night,” he said, “something called The Sheds.”
So we shared a laugh, the drizzled eventually disappeared, and a decent-sized audience (which The Spare Room turns into an uncomfortable crush) emerged from their shelters to join us.
After the lights drop and we’re shown documentary footage covering the attempts to mate Lonesome George (the last known Galápagos tortoise in existence), I almost started thinking that this show could be an educational ecological experience, perhaps linked by some awkward humour… all such thoughts were immediately dispelled, however, by the entrance of Ryan the Bisexual Lion. Ryan’s lion costume – patches of comical fur on a yellow lycra bodysuit, which he manages to wear about as well as can be expected – is ludicrous; the stories he manages to weave amongst the titular animal sex facts are both entertaining and thought-provoking.
To say that Ryan’s sex life – which he’s (mostly) willing to discuss in full and humorously frank detail – differs from the norm is an understatement. Besides the “bisexual” part of his nom de plume (he gets his tech to initiate a Grindr session early in the show, and regularly checked in to see what offers he’d received throughout), he also talks of the sex parties he’s been to, kinks and perversions, and – somehow – always manages to tie his admissions back to the animal kingdom. Gay penguins, murdering mantises, and dick-headed penis-flower hermaphroditic slugs (seriously, watch that video!) are some of the examples that Ryan uses to parallel his own sexual development… to obvious humorous effect.
And whilst nature is used to accentuate the comical nature of Ryan’s stories, it’s not all played for laughs: Ryan is a staunch supporter of polyamory, and speaks tenderly of his dreams to raise children with his two partners. Those moments feel very honest and raw, and contrast markedly with the more traditional standup delivery of most of his material… but there’s also a number of fantastic storytelling rants that provide a rapid-fire melding of fact and personal opinion that almost left me giddy with delight. On the other hand, for the second time today, there was an audience singalong to end the show – is this becoming a thing, now? I’m not sure I like it, and if you’ve ever heard me “sing” you’d understand why.
But the big moment in Sex with Animals for me was… well, probably not something that anyone else would have connected with. There was a short snippet where Ryan starts… well, I’d like to say “lamenting”, but he seemed a little more matter-of-fact about it. Anyway, Ryan starts lamenting that that endless positivity and one-sided love and hope and commitment isn’t enough to bring your mate to you… and I just sat there awkwardly, thinking “I know, mate. I know.”
And that may be confirmation bias talking, but that was special.
It’s fair to say that Sex with Animals was kinda what I expected… and yet almost completely not what I expected. Which is contradictory, but hey – I know what I mean. Fun stories, well told, by a man in a lycra suit… with a little bit of Deep Stuff to take away, too. Great stuff.
(32) Sex with Animals: A lot less animal fucking (and more polyamory) than expected… Great storytelling rants. #ff2014 #ADLfringe
— Pete Muller (@festivalfreakAU) February 19, 2014