[2015082] Fake it ’til you Make it by Bryony Kimmings and Tim Grayburn
Bryony Kimmings & Tim Grayburn @ Royal Croquet Club – The Black Box
8:00pm, Thu 26 Feb 2015
Here’s another show that had a heap of Fringe-going buzz around it… but the buzz was somewhat tempered. Rather than the usual “You must see this!” kind of rave, Fake it ’til you Make it got more guarded “Oh, it’s amazing…” statements that trailed off as the recommender re-comtemplated the show.
And that’s fair enough, really… because not everyone would be thrilled to go and see a show that focusses on clinical depression.
But Bryony Kimmings kicks off Fake it ’til you Make it by declaring that it’s “a love story”. And that’s certainly true: at the top of the show, there’s a lot of delightful vignettes between Kimmings and her (real-life) partner, Tim Grayburn: we’re told of their burgeoning love, the extraordinary and everyday blisses, and we watch them dance together, and it’s super sweet. But all the while, Tim is hiding in plain sight. His face – his eyes – are obscured from the audience by clouds, paper bags, masks… sometimes comically so.
The performance takes a bit of a dark turn when Kimmings recounts the discovery of pills in Grayburn’s possession; despite being in a relationship with him for several months, she had no idea that he had been taking the pills… anti-depressants, as it turned out.
Thereafter rolls a discussion of the stigma associated with clinical depression in men: the perceived inability to talk about it, the societal dismissal of depression as an issue (the phrase “suck it up” rightfully comes in for a battering), and the compounding effect of masculine stereotypes. This discussion mixes media, as befits Kimmings’ performance-art roots: they erect a little tent onstage and use it to present lovemaking shadow puppetry; they play recorded snippets of their common exploration of Grayburn’s depression (which were occasionally a very tough listen). The moments documenting Tim’s withdrawal from anti-depressants? Harrowing.
But the narrative leads to the realisation that, as a couple, they could help both Tim and others – sufferers of clinical depression, and the people that love them – by creating a performance… this performance. Grayburn – who works in advertising, and is certainly not a self-proclaimed performer – agrees… but only if he can hide his face. Hence, the masks… and a beautiful denouement.
(Without wanting to belittle Tim’s plight) I battle with depression as well; it’s very much a cyclical thing with me, but I’m “lucky” in that the dark patches seem to be getting shorter, and the intervals between them getting longer. But that’s taken a fair bit of work on my (and my counsellor’s) part… and – as open as I can be – there’s still a tinge of shame associated with talking about that.
And that’s what was so heartwarming about Fake it ’til you Make it for me: it created a compassionate, safe space where it was possible to recognise and talk about depression, love, and emotional support from a male perspective. It was fearless in what it showed the audience about the performers (especially Tim, the non-performer), and the closing moments? So very, very, tear-wellingly beautiful and touching and wonderful.
(82) Fake it 'til you Make it: Beautifully sculpted clinical depression centered love story. Magical closer. #ff2015 #ADLfringe
— Pete Muller (@festivalfreakAU) February 26, 2015